SOOC: Last Week of Break

Wow, this break was late in coming, but a nice long rest once it came. After all the frenzied activities of the two weeks leading up to Christmas, it was so nice to have the time to recover and enjoy the little things. Here are some from our first week in the New Year, all straight-out-of-camera (SOOC):

Our outdoor cat, enjoying her indoor buddy.

Movie afternoon!

Spa morning, with two-toned glitter nails!

Treetop sunset out back.

Sunset from our front.

Starting 2012 right, with another week of participating in the SOOC action at
Marvelous Mommy's blog. Come on over to see more or join in!

Flipped-up Friday

James' Dad is calling in sick and there went my plans for the day - flip!

I'm actually glad he's taking time to rest before he suffers a health setback. However, now I need to rethink the day. I've got to make sure a few things get done, think about the new best order for getting chores and errands accomplished. I also need to factor in the noise. My husband needs more quiet than is possible with the kids at home.

Now I consider my options. For getting the kids out of the house, we can use the gym, library, and the grocery store. If the weather is nice, I can run some errands near a park, where they can run around some more. Maybe I'll get their bikes in the van and let them ride for a bit.

Luckily (I guess), we've not been able to get play dates to gel over this holiday, so I don't have a third party to contact and rearrange. For myself, I'll make sure the camera is charged and try to take some photos that interest me. I'll bring along a book to read at the gym while I work out. I'll work with my daughter to plan a dinner that we can enjoy as a family. I'll tickle James and work on some flash cards with him. I'll get time to talk with my husband. I'll take deep breaths, as I flex again to go with the flow.

New Things on a Thursday

We're still on vacation, so after dropping Daddy off at the bus stop this morning, we ran some errands before heading up to Nana and Apu's house for some furniture rearrangement. Whew! After that, we hung out at home. I proposed going out to a park and encountered meltdown. Belay that outing.

So we took it easy some more, calmed down, and had lunch. I actually got most of the decorations down and the dangerously dessicated tree out of the house. It's the earliest I've ever taken down Christmas and I realized that I didn't get out a third of my things in the first place because things were so stressful and sad. It was kind of a blank feeling, like "well, that was pretty much a wash-out this year." We all did all make it through -- that's the main thing.

We worked on our thank you cards from Christmas and then took advantage of the warm afternoon and went swimming. While James and his sister had a blast, I worked the kinks out of my knees and blissed out in the outdoor jacuzzi while keeping an eye on the kids. James was excited to see one of his teachers from school and talked to her whenever he got near her.

Then it was time for out of the pool. James started crying, he was so cold once he the chilly afternoon air hit him. Luckily I changed him in less than a minute. It took longer to calm him down though. And lately, when he gets upset, he cries and starts shouting things like "You SHUSH!" and "And I said NO!!!" and "You go away now, Mommy!"

I don't get mad at him, but I do let him know that last one is really rude and he needs to say sorry. Then I get him to talk about what's bothering him (like this afternoon -- "Sounds like you're pretty cold, is that right?") and show him there's a solution that will make things a bit better ("Let's get on our dry clothes and go home. We can visit the helicopters on our way. Won't that be fun?")

Unfortunately, our gym's only family bathroom and shower are outdoors, which is really inconvenient in winter.  I strategized the bathing scenarios on the way home. Myself first, and then a bath for James while I dried my hair. Then wash James' hair (cringing as I think about this, but it's necessary) and dry him off while my daughter cut up potatoes for baked fries for dinner. Then clean up tree needles and get ready for dinner while daughter showers. Have James watch a video while I help her rinse, apply conditioner, and comb out/blow dry her long hair. All that took over an hour, but we all enjoyed our dinners with clean (dry) hair in our jammies. Thank the heavens that James has stopped screaming and crying if I turn on the hair dryer.

I cringe just thinking about washing James' hair. because it requires nerves of steel. He howls, screams,  cries, and thrashes so. Plus his cries of "No, Mommy, NOOOOOOOOOO!" make me feel like I am scarring him for life. Usually it takes him a LONG time to calm down after ... or he passes out into an early bedtime.

This time, however, he was merely unhappy. No crying. I hardly breathed through the whole operation. Another new thing - he talked out the steps in advance; we agreed on how many scoops of water we'd use to wet and then rinse his hair, as well as how long we'd do the actual shampooing.

Part of me want to light a candle, or something, in hopes that the water torture of bathing is behind us. Both my children hated having their heads get wet like. They howled and cried and screamed like possessed monkeys. After struggling for years with my daughter, I was sapped for dealing with James when he started rebelling. My husband does not help bathe the children, so I put off kid bathing and hair washing for ridiculously long periods of time. This past month I've finally nerved myself to do more often, and I think it's now becoming part of The Routine.

Last new thing: James, sitting on the sofa, reading "Where the Wild Things Are" to himself. He can memorize books like this, but I watched him and he was prompting himself by reading the words. What a warm glow that was! He also likes this book now because he identifies with Max. I think he needs some Wild Things in his room ...

Special Exposure / Wordless Weds: At The Bedroom Drive-In

My husband and I like to be creative. James' Dad excels at getting creative with materials most people would throw out or donate, especially electronics. Last weekend, he hooked together a sound system and projector he found used, and plugged it into my laptop. He brought up Netflix, aimed the projector at our wall and and voila! Movie night on our bed for the whole family!

I call it the Bedroom Drive-In.
(Here's to you, Jo-Bob!)

The kids adored it. I enjoyed the entire experience, which was rather like watching a movie with a litter of restless, adorable puppies.

 

What did we watch?

Phineas and Ferb, The Movie: Across the 2nd Dimension (2010).
Gotta love the Buckaroo Banzai reference!

I've got to tell you, this is the way to see movies with your kids. Especially young ones or kids with special needs. We can adjust the sound and lighting. James can roll around the bed, kick me gently to get his sensory feedback, and even get up and wander a bit without us getting stressed out. No annoying cell phone interruptions. Bathroom breaks are a breeze and snacks don't break the bank.

To see more images or to share some of yours,
visit Special Exposure Wednesday at 5 Minutes for Special Needs.






               and ... Wordless Wednesday

A Thankful Pause

I've put up my share of frustrated posts about people not understanding what a day in my life is like. How things that seem so simple to other parents are like mountain climbing with a hippo for me and mine. How there are some mainstream things we'll never be doing and concerns we have that many do not.

This one is a bit of the flip side, about being thankful for the people we've met who've become friends. Who know us and like us for being exactly how we are, not what we look like. I've been discovering a lot of them lately, when my husband's health crisis started to get really bad.

The kind and thoughtful people at both kids' schools, who helped with emails, calls, and information. Some of their thoughtful, unsolicited help literally brought tears to my eyes. Even while part of me was burning with shame to be in a position of needing help, most of me was so grateful that it was there, and kindly meant.

Ditto the nice people at our bank and credit union branches. Especially the big bank branch. I may hold your company in general and CEOs in low regard as opportunistic jerks, but you were my heroes who pulled out all the stops you could and made whatever possible work for me to help protect my family, and I won't forget it. You also remembered me weeks later, and asked especially how our holidays went. I could tell you were really, REALLY hoping they were good.

Our neighbours, who pitched in for a last-minute hour of sitting after bedtime, so I could handle an auxiliary emergency the week before Christmas. For being caring and friendly, making us glad (yet again) to belong to this community.

For friends, who were there for me and the kids, so I could be there for my husband. For texting and calling and helping me laugh. I am not going to forget how you helped. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

For my family, who has been having one of the most stressful and heart-breaking years we've ever known. For bailing me out, listening, venting, and trying to keep living as joyfully as possible. Our laughter may have a jagged edge or five, but there's love, and that lets me hold on tight and take a deep breath to see things through.

Magic Marker Monday: Fine Art

James started to make his own pictures this year. Usually starting with spirals and jaggedy sunburst things. His sister made similar pictures when she was 3 or 4.

Recently, he drew a picture of his sister, from memory. His first portrait. I watched him make this, and he talked his way through the picture, from the head, eyes, smile and hair ... to the body .... to the two feet and legs. Wow! And he made her smiling. There goes my melty heart again.

He used some of the materials he received at Christmas (thank you, back-to-school sale stash!)

For more great masterpieces or to share some of your own,
visit 5 Minutes for Special Needs for more Magic Marker Monday.

                         

Another New Year's Beach

Today we jumped in the car and visited our friends who were staying the weekend up in Stinson Beach. It was such a gorgeous day that we made a short trek from the rental house to the beach. The skies were clear, the air warm, and the wind was practically non-existent. Very unusual for January 1.

Both kids ran about on the beach, splashing in the low waves, digging and throwing sand, and bringing in rocky treasures (James' big sister) or worries about the dogs on the beach (James). We hauled them in just before sunset. Good thing too. I'd forgotten how quickly the sun goes down in winter, and the cold starts back in just before the light goes.

It's been about a year since this group had seen James. His new height and verbal social activities did not go unnoticed. It was good to get caught up and be social myself. I'm getting rusty at that.

James went from asking to play Angry Birds to demanding to go home to refusing to leave. After dinner, you see, Big Sister started a treasure hunt game, and James and the other young child were totally caught up in it.

The winding roads were a bit much for him in the dark, but I took it slowly, admiring the moon, sea, and stars from the corners of my eyes. He was asleep before we got home. I loaded him into bed, only pausing to remove his rain boots and tuck the blankets around him.

Happy New Year, Baby -- I love you, Mom.