#WorldAutismAwarenessDay

It's World Autism Awareness Day, and Autism Awareness Month

Love this guy so much. Learned so much.

The United Nations is holding an Inclusive Quality Education for All Virtual Event: Friday, 8 April 2022, 10:00 - 11:15 a.m. EST.

This is incredibly important for our kids and future. Please see the link below.

While inclusion is not the answer for everyone, the world needs an introduction into the lives of a segment of the population that continues to grow. Understanding and reaching out makes for a better future together - socially, spiritually, independently, and financially.

Link to register - open to all: Inclusive Quality Education for All Virtual Event on 8 April

Autism Awareness Month: 2021

This year, fewer posts. Our lives are still full of remote work and learning, isolation, hard things, and too much paperwork. The pandemic continues, and autism never just goes away. 

This week, I came across this post, and words of wisdom, again, from Feda Almaliti. I can't believe that she and her son are gone. I will share her words, because they are positive and helpful. They also keep her alive in my memory and heart.

"You Can't Do This Alone", by Feda Almaliti

Click for the full article in the National Council on Severe Autism

Autism Awareness 2020 Style

So, missed posting on April 2, but Autism is in the house (now more than ever), 24/7. Next week I begin week 4 of working remotely, and James' break from school and programming starts 5 weeks.

He hasn't been home with me this much since he was much younger, and I was on a break from work:

We have had some behavioural regressions, but things seem to be falling more into place, especially since his school has worked hard to get him and his classmates into an online schedule for school, which includes a mix of videos, assignments, and video chats.

My, how he loves those video chats!

If you know someone who has a family member on the autism spectrum, please reach out to say hello. We appreciate it more than you can know.

Declarations and Life Goals

We are finally getting rolling with ABA intake, and hope to have services starting next month.

The last question was addressed to James: "What do you hope to get out of these sessions?"

His answer blew us all away: "I want to feel self-confident."

First: I love how James was engaged and made a crucial partner in this process.

Second: The honesty of his answer. This guy has a huge piece of my heart. I am cheering for him all the way, because this has to feel huge - especially at the start of his teen years.

Third: I'm not crying, you are!

U is for Universe

On the upside of some extreme house cleaning: We have found the letter U!

I knew it was in there somewhere. Somewhere turned out to be in a rarely used bookshelf in the dining area, buried under cassette tapes and unused jewelry gift boxes that the kids loved to collect.

This has made James so happy. He truly is a Mr. Thing-in-their-place. Universal happiness, brought to him by the letter U.

Finding Your Own Words? Priceless.

James started saying words at age 3. Not everyone could understand them. The first time he told me he loved me, he was 4. Yes, I cried.

James has an interesting solution for communicating asking people questions he knows the answers to, scripting, and echolalia.

At 11, not everyone can understand everything James says. But he now can express himself (good and bad, this guy lets it all out). It's such a relief to feel like our communication window has opened wider.

Imagine being without words.

Autism Speaks has come up with an app to help: Able AAC. For the month of April, Autism Awareness month, it's free. FREE! Spread the word!

April 2, And I See Blue

World Autism Awareness Day is April 2, 2016

How has your Saturday been going? I have spent mine doing errands, taking care of groceries, errands, and clean up. James is enjoying Little Einstein videos, because they discuss music and musical instruments. We played Red Ball off and on.

Why this post? 

If you don't have anyone in your life who is autistic, you may not be aware that April 2 is a kind of world-wide call to action about a developmental issue that is may look invisible, but will be a significant part of our futures.

What do I mean by calling autism invisible?

Well, autism tends to not have physical deformities. Autism presents differently for each person. For some, there is not a whole lot to see. Examples:

• James is now doing his homework with only verbal prompts! He is 11, and his homework is basic arithmetic (this year -- last year he was doing long division, but that is a big digression) and his reading choices are pretty much "Green Eggs and Ham," "Where the Wild Things Are," and "Captain Underpants." I will supplement with multiplication tables and Chrestomanci, but am thrilled that this is the year he tackles homework without my being there right beside him.
• James is becoming more independent, doing his laundry, taking out garbage, and helping me do the grocery run and pick up around the house. These are life skills that take perseverance to make into habit, and we were  told a couple times he'd never be able to do this. We tried anyway, and will continue to do so. Money is a tough nut to crack.
• Last week, James was able to tell a family friend about a tough day he had at school. Because of his language delays (We were told after 6 months of speech classes that he might be non-verbal), this is huge. James started speech therapy at the age of 2 and continues to receive it at school. With his participation in a social communications class at the Swain Center, he is finally beginning to be able to let people know how he is feeling.
• This morning, I took James with me on a breakfast errand, as he wakes up happy and bouncy. His teen sister needs a peaceful wake-up. It is a fact that siblings of kids on the autism spectrum need to be remembered, and have their needs met too. It can be sadly too easy to lose sight of, amidst IEPs, appointments, and other worries. I plan special time with my daughter because we both enjoy it and we both need a break from autism idiosyncrasies. 
• I have to make a to do item to call, text, or email my friends. Autism can be very isolating. I can't do a Girls' Night Out or cannot attend many social events due to sensitivities and other issues. Movies are either in-home or Sensory-Friendly theater showings. Eating out can be  nerve wracking.

All this to say ... please consider that autism is alive and growing. Legislation for Autism continues to be debated. Healthcare reforms for autistic patients come and are challenged. Every 11-20 minutes, a parent or family's life take a sharp detour with a diagnosis of autism. As many families tend to fall off the social radar of many friends and family, they become unseen.

Autism will affect you, either directly or indirectly. The current large swell of previously diagnosed children are fast growing up, along with James. The benefits of early intervention are many, but what will their futures be? It is my hope that autistic adults will find their places in their communities, making a life working with others in places like the supermarket, schools, and local businesses.

Thank you, President Barack Obama, for recognizing World Autism Awareness Day.

What can you do? Be supportive of those friends or families sealing with autism. Recognize that legislation relating to IDEA, Regional Centers, and healthcare affect not only you, but also those largely unseen, growing numbers of individuals with special needs ... and send an email or make a phone call when voices are needed to continue services and programs that are designed to help them be as independent as possible.

World Autism Day 2015

This is my seventh year of participating in World Autism Awareness Day. It's been over seven years since our son was officially diagnosed with Autistic Spectrum Disorder (ASD), about a year after I started worrying something might be going awry with our son's development.

The last year or two have been especially wearing: special meetings, constantly out-thinking the Box, the Man, the big A, the System, the Specialists, the Bureaucracies ... the economy (and our income) taking a nose dive ... serious health issues from all sides that just keep coming ... and being an older parent to begin with. It's all starting to tell on us.

Dealing with Autism, it's a Life Journey. We all have them, true. This Life Journey with Autism is intense and unrelenting. I just have to think about the top struggle recently to get our son to deal with the literal ins and outs of eating recently that had gone from okay to life-threatening over the course of a few short months. How to balance that constant worry and focus with the other parts of life and other family members.

It makes the little things in life so important.

Its so easy to get caught up in the iPhone, iPads, hair styles, and movies. The vacations, the selfies, the food photos in social media (raising my virtual hand here) ... they are fun, and fun is needed in life.

The little things ... rare quiet moments of connecting with loved ones and good friends - in spite of everything tough. That is an achievement. Something to savour. Ten quiet minutes in the garden. Watching your child succeed against all odds - not in a 4.1 kind of way, either. Reading a book on their own. Exploring their world with enthusiasm and confidence. Completing an assignment on their own with their class. Being handed a dandelion to wish on. Having your sleep invaded because someone had a bad dream and can't let go until they curl up with you for a bit. Funny random songs and dances. Hugs, when I least expect it and totally need it.

They are all still there and possible.

Have courage. Have hope. Consider the little things. Consider others, with a more open mind.

Our world can sure use it.

Autism Awareness Month: Apps for Us

Technology is balance  act, for parents of kids on the spectrum. It can help the nonverbal be expressive. It can feed their visual strengths. Be a great tool for learning.

And if your kid is like mine, they will latch onto movies or an iPad or mobile device and focus only on that for hours.

And if you are tired and sleep-deprived, like I am, at first you're all

and  

... and then um, oh. I guess that's not such a good idea, to have them obsess over something that is not a substitute for interacting with people and the world.

After six years of learning about autism, I probably let James have too much time with technology. He seems so happy when using it and being able to have iPad time is a great incentive for positive behaviours and rewarding good work. I also need a break from constantly being "on" and now, working full-time and making sure the school routines run smoothly(ish) once the kids are home. Oh, that is such an easy trap to fall  into.

However, a nice benefit of Autism Awareness month is that there are interesting, non-Angry Birds/Minecraft/Star Wars/LEGO apps that are offered for free.

I thought this one looked interesting:

Articulation Station

James actually plays math and spelling apps for fun on his iPad, so this might also be worth a try:

Splash Math

And there are websites devoted to apps for interested parents to check out. It's kind of like trick-or-teating for apps for our kids. What did you find?

Autism Awareness: Always

It's April 2nd, and World Autism Awareness Day is almost over. I have not put blue lights out or done much writing lately, but I am awware. Every day.

Autism has punched us in the gut and wrung our hearts. It's given me a new appreciation of what I really do have, and many more blessings in the little things in life meaning so much.

• My son's hand in mine. Being able to have him tell me what happened in his day. 
• Conquering hopscotch. 
• Watching him write. 
• Hearing him read all the road signs or playing the alphabet game on the way to school. 
• Finding out he chose to play football with his classmates at free choice, instead of playing games on the computer. 
• Watching him "conduct" music from the very back of the multipurpose room during his sister's chorus performance. Having his help with household chores.

• The pat on my back and whispered "It's okay, Sweetie, it's oooo-kaaaay!" when he sees me upset or sad.

• The Trader Joe's lady, who waits for him to come visit with her after he finds the Peanuts character in the store. 
• The boys in his class who hang out of car windows and yell "Hi, James!" during after school pickup as we walk to our car. 
• Seeing peoples' faces soften as he skips past them. 

All special things I might have been too busy to notice, if I had not been made aware.

What would I hope for others to be aware of? Please don't put people in an autism box. Please don't get too caught up on test scores and check boxes. Please don't see a price tag or something dangerous.

Listen to the parents. Take a good look at all the little things, and be aware that they matter, and you can help make them happen.

Help us. Help us find answers, solutions, and a better future together.

One thing I will be doing, is walking this month to raise money and awareness for Autism Speaks . Please help, if you can, and thank you.

Capturing an Essence

On this final day of April, and Autism Awareness Month, I have found two perfect thoughts that capture the essence of what I've been feeling lately as I try to communicate what life is like for someone on the spectrum, as well as for those who love and care for them.

I found them, on all places, on a blog about art and photography from a French female artist. In a way, this is very appropriate, as I have found in France the inclination to look at and celebrate the individual, rather than submit to the herd mentality and do it up better than the Jonses.

1) "Everybody has a beauty to them and you have to try to capture it. As I said, put them in the right light at the right angle in the right moment."

 I feel this is what I have been fighting to get for James in school this year and which, thankfully, we've achieved. My ASD child does not test or present at all well on standardized scores. Rather, he needs the "right light" (or perception) and more patience for his abilities and personality to show through. And he is beautiful. Oh yes. And funny, capable, curious, smart, caring - so worthy of effort.

2) "For unphotogenic people, it just takes more love and more time :)"

 Swap in "special needs" for "unphotogenic" and BINGO! This is my life.


Thank you, Garance, for helping me find the words.

For all reading this post, this is part of why we try to raise awareness. We are trying to adjust the "light" (perceptions) so you can see that under a surface that looks different, weird, and maybe scary is a person. A real person with their own unique beauty. They take more to develop. More effort, time, money, and love. But inside is a person who can grow, thrive, and give back. And we love them.

Special Exposure / Wordless Weds: P is For ...

Plate, Piano, Playful ... James asked me to take this Picture:

Parley. James is getting too attached to plugging into electronics. With the warmer weather picking up, we are spending more time at the Pool. Sometimes he goes right into the water, other times he wants no part of it. Then we negotiate, and ease into unplugging with a little Phone app activity poolside before swimming.

Peaceful. Mornings on weekends, especially, are becoming more and more My Time again. I pad outside to our back yard and this is the view I enjoy:

Positive focus. It just makes life better.


For more images from the heart and to share some of yours,
visit Special Exposure Wednesday at 5 Minutes for Special Needs.






               and ... Wordless Wednesday

Tackle It Tuesday: Alongside, Awareness, Action

I read this interesting article in a feed from MyAutismTeam.com and it brought up an good topic. The article is titled "What Typically Developing Children Learn Alongside Their Differently Abled Peers" and reminds us that programs like full-inclusion in classrooms and elsewhere in society can result in more typically abled people learning from those with special needs.

To me, this can bring anything from awareness to a desire to become more involved and help others. Also importantly, it begins a change in perception for next generations to be more open to the idea that there is more than one way or pace to live a life. And yes, I've seen it around me. My family's become more aware of what it means to be autistic. People in our community see James on a regular basis and start to see past the stims to his personality. Two of our respite care givers have learned more about special needs and run with it, helping James practice his letter writing, reading, and math.

At the CATS Party; he won a tool set!

There are ordinary people whose lives were touched by special needs and turned what they learned into programs to help others. Lorna Catford's daughter was born with many special needs. What she learned by trusting her observations turned into parental advocacy and a wonderful institution called the CATS (Collaborative Autism training & Support) Program. This program not only helps and support families of kids on the autism spectrum, it also helps train students to work with our kids and prepare them for a variety of new opportunities related to special needs. We've participated in this program 3 times; the support, information, and warmth it provides is truly a gift.

George Lawson saw a baseball program for special needs kids and was so inspired by what he saw that he started a program of his own here in Sonoma County, the Wonder League of Healdsburg. We appreciate it, because I don't know that James would enjoy that Challenger games as much as the Wonder League, let alone a regular Little League team. This will be our 3rd year of hitting baseballs, practicing our throwing, and running bases. James' big sister is an enthusiastic participant. Our guy adores his baseball shirt and cap. George told me of one game where a wheelchair-bound player was celebrating a solid base hit with a thumbs-up, and our son ran to him and gave him a high five. That's a greatest game moment right there.

Just this year we changed class rooms for James. He went from one where he was included, yet not connected to one that had students who swooped him up in class activities and saw him as part of their whole the first week he was there. As a parent, the feedback I got went from "problems and issues" to "doing good and these things need work." Might sound slight, but it's a huge change for the better in our lives.  To me, it's the best about the possibilities of full inclusion in a class that's a mutual good fit.

 So how will our world change, with children being exposed to differently abled peers, and learning alongside us about autism? I hope it's for the better, with less us/them attitudes and more of a we concept. I hope it results in more open minds, sparks of curiosity, and ability to work, live, and love together.

 

I know this is a rather abstract Tackle project, but I'm driven to advocate for acceptance and programs that will help my guy every day. Especially when I see his beautiful happy smile, and feel his joy at being in the world.

Special Exposure / Wordless Weds: Those Smiles

I can't get this picture out of my head, so I am sharing it again here today:

James with his friend Ronnie -- team leader of Hope for Buddies and Friends,
co-chair for the North Bay Walk Now for Autism Speaks.
She's been part of our lives for over 5 years. We were so excited to see her before the walk.

For more images from the heart and to share some of yours,
visit Special Exposure Wednesday at 5 Minutes for Special Needs.






               and ... Wordless Wednesday

Walking With Our Buddies And Friends

Some pictures need no words:

James and his buddy Ronnie

Some photos from today's walk. We picked up some more information from the Resources booths, saw friends, and enjoyed being out on a nice Spring morning.

Word is really getting out about Autism, but we still need your help!

Getting ready to walk ...

Rounding the corner on Lap 2.

Visiting the Cypress School booth, looking at PECS and drinking cool water from my special water bottle.

We are proud to be walking with our Buddies and Friends. We still need answers.

Activities for Special Needs Kids

This has been a good year for getting James more active. Although he has some issues, such as low muscle tone, uneven fine muscle control in his fingers, and vestibular disorders, James is a guy on the go. He likes people and being able to play sports is becoming more of a requirement for him to participate at recess and social occasions with others.

So we love it when we hear about programs for kids with special needs. Any helpful boost we can get for our kids is an investment that pays rich and diverse dividends. Here are some programs we've used over the past year:

Healdsburg Wonder League

A non-profit organization that runs a mini baseball league designed for children, ages 4–19, with special needs. Their first game is this weekend and it's not too late so sign up for this season! Find out more on their website (http://wonderleague.org/) and come on out to cheer on the Players and their Buddies. James and his sister have enjoyed two years with this great program. Our daughter learned to hit a pitch, and James has actually improved his throwing skills. Here are some posts about our experiences.

Saturday Sidekicks

We've had some fun Saturdays down at Sonoma State. The Saturday Sidekicks program has truly made both kids excited about being more active. It's nice to have some focus time too where the kids and their university sidekicks join in a circle to sing and try a group activity. The energy is high and the kids get a chance to do outside of normal play, such as ride a plastic scoot, get rolled down a ramp while inside a tubular mat, or ride on a platform swing. Being pulled on a blanket while sitting in an inflatable raft is novel, as is having a big cardboard box to hide out and giggle inside. We sure hope to participate in Saturday Sidekicks next year!

Town of Windsor Parks and Rec

We've tried two programs, with gratifying success. Half days of summer camp sessions and group swim lessons. For both, I've gone in person to the office to talk about James and his needs. At first, they were willing to give it a try, with the clear condition that the counselors were not 1-on-1 aides and that if there were too many issues for either of us we'd withdraw James. Amazingly, issues never came up.

Instead, with the summer camp, his verbal abilities soared, and he got into crafts and enjoyed play times. He loves wearing the camp t-shirts all year long. At the talent show last summer, he insisted on performing a song learned at camp on stage, solo, with a microphone. I heard he was a fun act to watch. I have strangers waving to me now at the Town Green, asking me to say hi to James. We remember the summer camp programs with great fondness.

The group swim lessons for kids were an important developmental milestone. I finally felt James was comfortable enough in water and group dynamics to get something out of a class and would not be too much of a distraction. It was a very good start and we'll be doing more this year. He even started to float on his back and jumped in at the last class, getting his head wet: victory over sensory issues!!

New to try this year,

Cycling Without Limits

James is eager to try and ride his bike without training wheels, like his big sister. His balance is rather precarious, so we haven't gotten there. Meanwhile, he is so big he is outgrowing his beloved Star Wars bike and bending the training wheels. Here's hoping both kids will be 2-wheeling it by Summer's end. We heard about the Cycling Without Limits program by participating in Saturday Sidekicks, and I am already looking forward to June.

Speaking of being physically active and programs supporting kids on the autism spectrum, James and I are walking this Saturday in the North Bay Area Walk Now for Autism Speaks event. Please join us in person at the Windsor Town Green or consider supporting us as we walk to raise awareness and funds to understand and create resources to deal with Autism.

Walking and Raising

Yes, this is late going up but yes, we will be walking in the 2013 Walk Now for Autism Speaks event this coming Saturday in Windsor, on the Town Green.

Yes, the numbers have risen again over the year: CDC now pegs the number of diagnosed children (ages 6-17) as 1:50 children and 1:31 boys. Last year they were reporting 1:88 and 1:54, respectively (for 8 year-olds). A diagnosis is made for some form of Autism every 11 minutes, instead of every 15 minutes.

Yes, we are making progress in understanding more about Autism -- its causes and resources for those affected by it.

Yes, there is more that needs to be done.

Yes, you can help:

Yes, you can come walk too! This will be our 4th year walking and every one has been a blast.
 * 2012
 * 2011
 * 2010

Apps Fantastic for Autism Awareness Month

Because it was such a great event last year I went looking for free or discounted apps today, World Autism Awareness Day 2013.

Yowza -- Smart Apps for Kids has a great post all set up with lists, links, and descriptions.

We don't have iPhones, but we do have iPads, and kiddos who love them.  We're also on a very tight budget, and so appreciate all the speciall offers out there, however fleeting they may be.

After a quick look-through, I think we'll be trying:

Toca House, because Toca Store and Toca Hair Salon are such bit hits. Both kids have been wanting to add apps and we hold to one a month, and they must do chores to earn the apps.

Happy belated Easter?

If it gets them interested in the real-life chore counterparts, I am all for this one. Best of all -- it's free!

Sequences for Autism
James is working on this at school for speech sessions, reading regrouping, and learning to write a story.

In fact, ever since the epic games of Hide and Seek with his cousins on Easter, we have been writing stories aloud about games of hide and go seek.

Another fun and timely app that's free for a limited period.

Picture Me Calm -- bee-cause we can all use a little more calm in our lives.

James is starting to experience frustration and anger more often, and I've been working with him to breathe deeply and communicate a little more maturely.

He's going to be a big guy. I want to get him some effective coping tools before the hormones hit.



What are other good apps out there for spectrum families?
    

World Autism Awareness Day ... Because We Already Know

Today is April 2, World Autism Awareness Day. If you are here to find out more about Autism and/or our journey, this post is for you.

Be aware. Be very aware. You are your child's best advocate.

It's been over 6 years since I felt in my bones that something was off about our beautiful boy. At 18 months, he didn't exhibit the same burst of development that his sister did.

He was happy and smiled, but did not "talk much." He rolled over a bit late; tried standing much later than his sister's 11 months. Once he started standing, the speech babble went away. His communication resembled a parrot's squawking.

His pediatrician told me I was being a worry mom; that I should not compare him to his precocious, older sibling.  Boys can often develop a little late, especially if they have a talkative big sister, he explained. Besides, he assured me, "he can't be autistic, because he looks you in the eye."
  

Do not be afraid to insist on assessments. Don't let fear of a diagnosis or well-meaning reassurances of family and friends put you off getting your child assessed.

By age 2 James started to scream and bite with frustration. He started zoning out on us, looking dreamily off into the distance and not responding to his name or attention-getting noises right next to him (yet he could hear a pencil drop on the other side of the house).

I came back to that pediatrician, who wanted to "give him 6 more months," and told him that what I needed was for him to call in a referral to have my son assessed for autism/developmental issues. I needed to know, I said -- if only if to be told to stop worrying. I needed that call NOW. He did call, but afterward was never comfortable in discussing my son's developmental issues.

There is help out there, and services are available that can help your child. The sooner you start, the better the response and results.

Within a month, a caseworker from the North Bay Regional Center came out and started giving me questionnaires to fill out. She chatted comfortably with me as we exchanged information, focusing attention on James as she tried to engage him with simple activities. After about half an hour, she started writing. When I asked what she was doing, she explained she was writing up purchase orders. What a lot there were: speech twice weekly, in-home and group developmental play therapies (each weekly), and weekly occupational therapy. Our lives changed with this visit, before we realized what was going on.

1 in every 50 boys. It can happen to your family. The numbers, when we started this journey, were 1 in 120 children. Every year there's been a scary march closer to 1 on 1 odds of a child being born with autism. Every year thousands more are diagnosed with spectrum disorders.

It took 5 months on a wait list to get James into the CAD clinic, where he was examined by a panel of medical, behaviourist, and developmental specialists.  The thought, going into the assessment, was that James would be found to be PDD-NOS. He actually scored a solid Autism Spectrum Disorder, which is technically more severe. Since then, we have become very aware. AndI have found the importance of building relationships with schools, doctors, and more people than I ever thought possible.

Communities and relationships are vital to stay afloat in a life or family that has been swamped with Autism or special needs.

The impact of James' diagnosis and special needs constantly strains at our family. We love him dearly and would not change him. We think his autism is part of who he is. We don't think it's caused by food allergies or vaccinations. I know that every child on the spectrum is unique, and presents as individually as "normal" kids do. I have learned the power of asking for help, felt acute relief and thankfulness for the kindness of someone who reached out to do something nice for me or mine "just because." Being with others who "get" what I am going through and don't attempt to brush off my worries, accepting it is what it is ... has never been more welcome.

Autism Moments You Know and Loathe

Scene: Waiting at big sister's school for her dismissal bell. On the low wall, outside the office (because that's the coolest place to wait on this hot afternoon; James melts in the heat, in more ways than one).

James: "I go sit in the office."
Me: "No, we need to stay out here."
James: "Nooooo! I wanna sit on na bench!" (which is inside the office)
Me: "Honey, they're busy right now in the office. Stay here with me outside."
James: "Arrrrrrrrrr!!! Rrrrrrrrrrrrrgh! You Shush!"
Me: "Want to sit on my lap?"
James: "Yes, up dere;" climbs on my lap.
15 seconds later "I wanna go in DERE!" Points to office and screeches.

Lady near us on the wall "Tchah!" and The Look.

Me (mentally rolling my eyes, because life is short and then we all die): "Hey, Buddy -- let's go sit on the benches over THERE." (partial shade under trees, 15 feet away)
James: "Okay, Mommy."

Some days I don't even want to go there. Maybe I'll start wearing my Autism Speaks t-shirt to all my pickup waits. What. Ever.

(Bonus points if you get this reference: "Looketh at my face -- Is this a bovvered face thou see before thee?")