Gift Giving and Autism

Gift Ideas for Autistic Kids

One would think that after almost 9 years of making Autism's acquaintance, I would be better at this. Alas, the thrill is still there: What to get for Christmas and James' birthday (which lands about 2 weeks after Christmas)?

With autism in the mix, I need to blend several areas of information together and throw "normal" out the window. It's not such a bad thing.

Consider

There are the things that James likes: Caillou (still, heaven help me), Curious George, Thomas Train, Baby Einstein, Upside Down Show, spinny things, gears, music, Pixar.

James' abilities: He is young and playful for his age, has some fine motor skills strengths and challenges, processing delays, and a fickle attention span. His dream is to play games on a Playstation, iPad, iPhone of his own for hours at a time and play arcade games like speedboat racers. He hates flies and gets anxious with outdoor sports and staying with a group.

There are the typical gifts for almost 12 year-old: iPad, iPod touch, cell phone, computer/Xbox, clothes, science/art/magic kits, skate boards, bikes.

There are the fun classic kid presents: Lego, puzzles, solar-powered toys, build your own computer/robot, books, movies, sports gear, toy vehicles, yo-yos, kites.

Discern

Your kid + autism = unique for them gifts. Here are some Christmas presents ideas for 2016:

• All 3 Toy Story movies in one DVD collection and Inside Out: letters to Santa and Social Communication therapy, thank you!
• Maps from AAA: he has been carrying them all over lately, placing cities and travel routes; thank you, CSAA membership!
• This nifty kids smart watch:
  VTech Kidizoom Smartwatch DX, Royal Blue (2nd Generation) (seriously, just read the features - I am jealous!). James will love the voice and picture filters!
• This smart little DIY marble run: After a frustrating experience with the taller, bendy multi-piece ones, I am hoping for true multi-time use and enjoyment with the Kengadget Crazy Ball Marble Run Set

For a birthday:

• music lessons (probably piano with a local family that teaches music out of their home)
• another movie -- digital purchase because...
• a Kindle Fire with a case

Your mileage may vary with a Kindle. I thought long and hard about it myself, as James has smashed some of his most favourite Apple electronics lately when in a temper and I will not replace them. The Apple IDs and iTunes are driving me nuts with their user unfriendliness.

The Kindle is not locked down very much, so I will let him use it on a limited time basis for good behaviour. It will be his. I am not getting the special kids' subscription or a warranty. I am making it very clear that he breaks it, no more Kindle. It was $33 on a Cyber Monday special with free shipping so the cost is not bad. He can use my Prime membership to watch movies and use his PBS Kids subscription, take videos and pictures, access digital books from our public library. I find it very easy to add apps and borrow/purchase/download media. Did I mention I got a really good deal on this?

There will always be clothes too, like nice big boy PJs, shirts, and pants. James is growing like a weed!

Holidays, Homework, Hornsby

Well, it's Tuesday night and another fun, action-packed 10-hour day is finally calming down.

Holidays

Due to way the heck overload on the visits to doctors and medical places in general, sometimes have this amazing schedule: work by 6:00 am (5:30, upon occasion), lunch around 10:30 am. Big "lunch" break that is actually used for medical/appointment runs.

I must say, we live in a beautiful  region. The trees are still flaming gold and red, brilliantly lit under stormy skies by stray ray from a Fall sun and framed by dark wet branches and trunks. Gold leaves lie in piles on the ground. The vineyards retain some colours yet as well. I see ravens, egrets, and countless other birds. Rainbows happen.

Traffic happens too, and drivers panicked by the recent election and rain on the roadways, but I digress.

Then back mid-afternoon for a couple hours of wrap up, to depart around 5:00 pm in the deepening gloom to pick up James from Boys and Girls Club (BAGC). Or is it the BAGC? Mr. Tumnus greets me at the door. A huge painting of a Lion proudly looks out over the room from a wall. Three snowy trees with beavers under them have displaced the Lost and Found table. On top of the backpack cubbies is a curious wardrobe. A castle gleams, far in the distance!

As we drive to the library or home, we take new streets, hoping to see new Christmas lights along the way. Christmas songs have been known to be sung.

Homework

Dang, what a difference a good teacher and IEP team makes! We are starting to receive Math sheets, Reading and content analysis, and more advanced spelling lists. James usually whips through this, sometimes at the BAGC's Power Hour (read "homework time"), sometimes at the desk in his room, but most often with me. He is much more independent when he works, and I am proud of him.

He has been asking about Egypt and Greece, so I know he is taking in some history. 

Every now and then it is hard to get James to focus. He falls apart as I watch. He is almost 12, so I make him some more dinner. That usually makes a big change for the better. He is getting much better at keeping track of his homework and putting it in his folder, then the folder in his backpack.

Hornsby

Sometimes, there is too much cacophony in the house. At times like this, I break out music. James likes Mozart and Bach. I like Christmas music and ... Bruce Hornsby. I play YouTube videos so James can watch him play. I also like Bruce Hornsby best during his live performances. After all the hectic craziness of the day, I find his music to be rich, full of life, and relaxing.

Ieine Kliene Nacht Music

Instead of reading together at night before bed, James has been asking for me to play videos of classical music. He picks the titles from his Baby Einstein DVD collection. Last night, we were fascinated by this recording:


Wow! I can literally "see" the music. It's fascinating that someone could think up these intricate interweaving of music and then note it down. I wonder if Mozart saw this in his head?

It reminds me of the Matrix:



... which is probably why James likes it!

Test Drive at the Library

James has been fixating on plotting the driving route from Northern to Southern California. He constantly asks which city is next, how we get to So Cal, and what the weather is like at various points. Common fixations are the Altamont Pass. He is also fascinated with the steep So Cal access road, in particular why we call it The Grapevine but it's official title is the Tejon Pass.

James also loves going to the library: computer time!

Put these things together, and you get:

Oh my!

Yin-Yang Holidays

It's been a rather black week, in which I had a day that literally sent me home early to go lie down in bed. A week who's motto should be "getting old is not for sissies." Where the bleak things in life had a party at my house, neighbourhood and family alllllll week long. And then followed me to work and popped up at my church.

So it's been an extreme relief to have a few days off, gather with family for a Thanksgiving together, hug my kids, and go see friends.

It was great to watch the next gen of cousins play together. Except for James, they are all now in their teens. Every time they get together, James asks to play hide and go seek, just about the only social game he knows and loves to play. Every time, they say yes, and then for HOURS they have the best time playing. They are so accepting, it is awesome to watch.

This year was no exception. The new twist is that James' cousin is a hide and seek ninja. Over 15 minutes and they could not find him in the house, which is not that big. Three times in a row.

He is good!

Angry Birds Metaphor

So it's raining and James and I are talking as we make the one big round of errands so we can stay home later, enjoying a warm, dry afternoon. We wound up discussing Angry Birds, always a favourite theme with James.

He had an interesting insight into the Matilda Bird, whom he has been drawing obsessively. To the point of roping me into a hunt for black paper and a white crayon (yes, we had both squirreled away somewhere) so he could colour her.

James wanted to know if I'd noticed that she is rounder before she drops her egg, and thinner after. I conceded he had a point. Why, he wanted to know? I asked him what he thought. His answer startled me:

"I think she puts the angry into her egg and when she drops it on the piggies, she gets smaller."

What a great metaphor for how you the deflated, de-energized state after an angry outburst.

Freedom of a Friday Night

We felt like celebrating the release from school for a week. Projects got finished at work. James had finished his homework packets and his school had their Stampede event that morning. He raised enough money to proudly wear his t-shirt. We made sure his good tennis shoes were on for the race. I wrote a note to please excuse him from running the event, asking that he be able to jog/walk it. I probably did not need to write the note, but it made James feel better.

After the afternoon pickup from Boys & Girls Club, which was suffused with a gleeful atmosphere, we enjoyed some time at the public library. James likes the library because he can play computer games and check out movies.

The nights are crisp and cold. We agreed that dinner out on the Town Green would be just the thing. So we walked over to KC's Diner and were seated by the fire pit on the patio. That and the waiter were as good as a floor show for James. He took it all in and sat the entire meal in his chair, which is something new for him.

We checked the Warriors game occasionally on the TV monitor, discussed the merits of ketchup and lettuce, and theorized the construction of the fire pit. Chicken strips, spinach salad and fried were consumed, and we were able to relax from weekday routine. The walk back to the car was cheerful and comfortable. James has been scripting the dining experience from the viewpoint of the waiter. It makes a nice change of pace from Spongebob, fractions, and spelling.