Sunday, April 25, 2010

Fear & Loathing and Potty Training

Let's see, what is you that you loathe the most? Or: how badly does Mommy need to get you to go? AKA: motivation with toys and food is for the other guys.

James hates getting his hair washed. Okay, "hate" is too passive a word. I can only say that the thing he hates even more that getting his hair washed is having to hear the hair dryer. Kick it up a few powers of ten and that's how much he hates to have his own hair blown dry.

Confessions of a very human parent: I have used this as a means of last resort when he has refused to pass BMs and potty training (and his well-being and my temper) is headed into ugly meltdown territory.
  • Fact: James can hold onto this stuff for up to three days, and that's with added fiber (Miralax) and a suppository already added into the equation
  • Fact: Starting Day 2 he gets cranky and by day 3 he can't settle down for anything, cries at meals, and is really, truly unhappy (and still refusing to poop)
  • Fact: toys, books, and food will not motivate him to go

James' SHAPE assistant helped enormously by discovering that he'd still for a while on the toilet while playing a game on her iPhone. After about *20 minutes* he'd deliver the goods. Yay, so I ran right out and bought 2 $1 electronic, handheld video games at WalMart. Occasionally, he used his dad's iTouch. And all was serene for about month.

Then the motivation stopped working, and so did the potty training.

On day 3 of another standoff, at my wit's end, I told him (in as calm a voice as I could muster) to pass some BMs or he'd get a shower, with hair washing and hair dryer. He called my bluff and said "I want the bath tub". I turned on the taps and swung him off the toilet and over into the tub.
- "No!! I don't wanna!"
- "Okay, go poo-poo."

Back onto the toilet, and 3 seconds later, he had produced a magnificent specimen. Water went off and I gave him a hug and told him he'd done a great job.

This so goes against everything I've been told. Why do we keep going there?

I am happy to report that after a couple weeks of the shower/hair dryer ultimatum the BMs are getting easier for him to pass on a daily basis. He even does it on his own some days. Not every day, mind you.

Oh no. That would be too easy.

Sweetie, if you ever remember this period in time, please also remember that I love you very much and could not think of anything else.

1 comment:

danette said...

(((hugs))) you're not alone... sometimes when all else fails we have to do things like this too. Not necessarily for BM's, but for other things. I hate having to use a "negative" approach like that but sometimes nothing else works :(.